Wednesday, August 10, 2016

Location! Location! Location!

Location! Location! Location!

Are you buying a house?

From shacks to mansions
and everything in-between,
this poem will help you figure out 
what those "House for Sale" ads really mean.

"Cute and cozy" means postage-stamp size.
A "fixer-upper" means it's a sight for sore eyes.
"Waiting for your own decorating style"
means making it livable is going to take a while.

"Newly painted" means purple and orange from ceiling to floor.
"Inviting" means there are no locks on the front door.
"Quiet neighbors" means it is next to a cemetery.
"A backyard garden" means lots of weeding will be necessary.

"Quaint" means shag carpeting from 1972.
"A river view" means buying flood insurance
is something you'll have to do.
"Spacious" means high ceilings and high heating bills.
"Historic" means old plumbing, no air conditioning, 
and windows painted shut to their window sills.

So, before you sign on the dotted line.
Take my advice and inspect that house well.
You might be surprised by a thing or two,
because there's a lot more to a house
than what those real estate ads will tell.

26 comments:

  1. Too funny, and too true!

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  2. Connie, this is fabulous! I have a big grin on my face right now:>) It sounds like you've bought a house or two...

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  3. This is especially funny to me since we just went thru the process of selling and buying! Our new home was listed as "move in ready".....for what, a sewer rat??? lol

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  4. chuckle!!! Yep - if it sounds too good to be true, it is....

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  5. Connie this made me laugh... I found this even when I was renting... some of the ads were so hilarious when you actually saw the place... Thanks for the smile, I always get one when I visit your blog xox

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  6. hahaha love it. When we sold our house I have to say it was truthfully detailed down to the last dripof water and the exhausted termites...ha. Such truth in that poem! Wondering where your inspiration came from - maybe a few surprises...

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  7. LOL. I haven't run into purple and orange walls but the rest is accurate.

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  8. A lot of truth in this fun poem! Have a wonderful weekend, Connie

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  9. Oh how I love this and so true.. Hope you have a nice rest of the week.

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  10. HA HA HA ----love this, and there really is a lot of TRUTH to those words.... I laughed outloud at the garden one --since I am constantly fighting the WEEDS.... Wonder why critters won't eat the weeds like they do the pretty flowers and bulbs??????? Hmmmmmm....

    Great post, Connie.
    Hugs,
    Betsy

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  11. Another great one, Connie! Perfect word descriptions!

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  12. You nailed it! A great reminder.

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  13. HA! Ain't that the truth? Suddenly, I'm very happy we AREN'T looking for a new house. :)

    Have a terrific weekend.

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  14. Hahhaha. This made me smile. You got it so right Connie. Words can change anything, make anything - even a not to good house sound amazing. Happy week amazing poet!!!

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  15. This is so funny and true!

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  16. This is so true and a very cute poem. It sure got my attention.

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  17. Very true...especially the "fixer-upper". What passes for one of those these days is just a hair from what used to be called an old shed. I hope I never have to move...I don't think I could handle the job for one thing and the prices are outrageous for another. Neat poem, Connie.

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  18. It is funny how they can twist the adjectives to mean whatever they think the buyer wants to read/hear :)

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  19. Great poem, with great words, which ring true in many situations.

    All the best Jan

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  20. Oh my gosh this is so true! I've just been through all this and it made me crazy. Gahh I never want to move again. It is kind of funny though. I'll be laughing about it all when the last box is unpacked.

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  21. Oh my goodness.......all of your definitions, rang so true........and made me laugh!

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  22. Nice and so spot on. I'm chuckling over it. We have only owned two houses, and one we built, but I tell you what, I would have appreciated some of those warning labels on this one. *sigh*

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  23. I love this - it's hilarious and clever. "Quiet neighbors" and "Inviting" are my favorites. I have a friend who lives across the street from a big cemetery. She never gets woken by loud parties.

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  24. Thanks, everyone, for your comments. We have moved several times over the years, and have learned first hand what some of the "code words" from real estate ads mean. This was a fun one to write.

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  25. Hmmm Connie, now you have me wondering if some of the words that have been used to describe the VA house we have been trying to sell should be revised. Maybe they are code words too? Thanks for a very entertaining looke at RE ads.

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